To summarize: I’ve had my Masters Degree for one month, my job search is ten applications deep with no leads, I’m in the middle of my first round of bills paid with a savings account, and the prospect of staying under the covers all day rather than facing my circumstances would sound better if it wasn’t 95 degrees every day. I’m not yet to the point where it would be more useful to burn my diploma for fuel, but I can see it in my future.
Like most recent college grads I have very few opportunities to score a job. Last month’s unemployment numbers hit me in the gut. Nine-point-two percent is sad, but for college grads that number is 12.1 percent, according to the United States Bureau of Labor Statistics. Every job description I’ve seen states that a qualified applicant will have experience, years of experience. I don’t have experience I have an education. But I know what would get me experience…a job. I should probably work on that.
While my lack of employment means I am living off of a rapidly dwindling bank account, I am fortunate enough to have avoided the move back to my parent’s house. This is not because I am independent and solvent. I would be living at home mooching off my parents if I wasn’t living with my partner mooching off of him. I don’t believe this is any better for my self-esteem. Parents, for the first stages of life, are legally obligated to care for you. And by that I mean pay for you. So by the time you’re finished with school and ready to get a job they’re in the groove, they’ve done this for years, you’re still a part of the budget. But a partner is supposed to pull equal weight, not weigh you down. I should be helping to pay the bills, not merely contributing to their growth.
The moral support is nice, though. “Take your time,” he says. “Help around the house and stuff. We’re not desperate yet.” Sweet, right? I’ve spent the last decade of my life, and enough money to buy a house, trying to educate myself so I could land a job that would raise my self-worth above cooking and cleaning for a man. I don’t want this statement to claim that I see no value in caring for your family by making sure their needs are met. But I do firmly believe that one’s personal needs are just as important. And what I need is a job.
But until that happens I will tend the garden, clean the bathroom, do the laundry, cook dinner, and email out another application.